5 Ways to be a Great Gift Giver

Holiday shopping and gift-giving are hallmarks of the season for many of us. But that’s not to say the tradition doesn’t come without its stresses.

What does your sister, spouse, or parent actually want? Will the packages arrive on time? Are you spending too much or enough?

Step one in taking the stress out of holiday gift-giving — or at least some of it — is remembering that the ritual is about more than the sweaters, socks, new bikes, or concert tickets, it is about connection.

Social connection contributes significantly to our happiness and well-being, and gift-giving can help reinforce the ties that are important to us, says Michael Norton PhD, a professor of business administration at Harvard Business School in Boston, who specializes in studying how decision-making affects well-being. “Gift-giving is a sign we care about the people in our lives,” Dr. Norton says.

His research has found that spending money on others tends to give greater happiness than spending money on ourselves.  And there’s evidence that giving our time and spending money on others is good for physical markers of health, too. Research suggests that thoughtful giving to others may help lower blood pressure and boost cardiovascular health, a study in the Journal of Psychology reported. That is a great side benefit!!

The bottom line, Norton says: When done right, gift-giving cultivates a stronger relationship between you and the recipient, showing you care and understand them.

So how do you pick out gifts that deliver all of those bonding, health-promoting effects without multiplying our stress? Here are some tips from Norton and others.

1. Choose Gifting Experiences

Experiential gifts such as movie tickets, an exercise class, or hosting a loved one for dinner make the recipient feel closer to the giver, not just when they’re unwrapping their present, but also later when they use the gift.

2. Think of Long-Term Satisfaction

Ever received a quirky gift that collected dust in the back of your closet until you ended up donating it? This may be because we have a tendency as gift-givers to want to give gifts that have a wow factor. But research says that a gift they’ll use over and over again is more valuable to the recipient. That means don’t shy away from buying a practical gift that will enrich your loved one’s daily life.

3. Don’t Make It a Burden

Whether it’s an experience or a possession, make your gift convenient and easy to use. For example, the closer restaurant may be more desirable than the fancier one that is an hour’s drive away.

4. Follow Instructions

If the person you’re shopping for gives you a Christmas wish list, avoid going rogue. The recipient actually wants what they asked for.

5. Don’t Feel Pressure to Splurge

Don’t bother breaking the bank on gifts for your loved ones. Though gift givers often think more expensive means more valuable, research says that spending more on a gift won’t get you extra appreciation from the recipient – and it may give you more stress, so “keep it simple” is a good mantra in gift giving.